“What makes folks run away from residence? Individuals flee from battle, starvation, violence, excessive poverty, and even journey or love. I left Lebanon. I’m actually at risk of being killed as a result of I used to be born within the improper physique, and wish to discuss it.
Once I was 9 years outdated, I checked out myself within the full-length mirror, and I couldn’t perceive why I didn’t have a lady’s physique. I establish with my 5 sisters. I feel I’m considered one of them. I really like taking part in with them; I wore my mother’s garments once I hung out with them. I hardly spend any time with my brothers.
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Overwhelmed and rejected
When my father noticed me like that, he beat me. He hit me so laborious with a stick that I handed out, blood popping out of my ears. One other time he stabbed me within the arm, and I nonetheless have a bodily scar.
What you see isn’t who I’m: I’m Leyla
He by no means accepted me. Even so, I’m a lady. I knew it then, and though I’m a father at present, I nonetheless don’t really feel like a person. I’m caught in my physique. I don’t desire a beard. What you see isn’t who I’m: I’m Leyla.
It’s not been straightforward, this selection, this life. I used to be mercilessly bullied at college. My father even tried to expel me. He kicked me out of the home, and I needed to work for a residing simply to complete faculty.
Then there may be the college. You’d assume I’d discover some tolerance there. I didn’t – similar story: bullying and discrimination, bullying and discrimination. I do know that schooling is the important thing to success and tolerance. And schooling is like forbidden fruit to me. The extra they attempt to hinder my development, the extra I wish to use it to pursue my targets.
Cowl
After school, I labored within the media and saved my identification a secret. Little by little, I began to acknowledge extra folks like me. Through the day we talk via secret indicators, however at evening I cover my beard, placed on a wig, and benefit from the feeling of being free, simply being myself.
I married a lesbian to appease my household and we have now two stunning youngsters
Regardless of some valuable moments, life is difficult. Very difficult. I married a lesbian to appease the household, and we had two stunning youngsters throughout our seven-year marriage.
In the long run, I made a decision to cease denying who I’m and work for our LGBTQI+ rights. I linked with others in that group and have become an activist, running a blog, and working an LGBTQI+ web site.
So I used to be there. Regardless of all of the hardships, double life and taboos, I had a very good life in Lebanon: I had a home, a pleasant automobile, a superb job, pals and great youngsters. nice…and hassle is coming to me.
‘Males come to kill me’
One evening I used to be at residence once I heard screams from outdoors and knew somebody had come to kill me. My life was a sin and worthy of loss of life, of their eyes. I jumped from the balcony and ran away.
I didn’t take something as a result of I simply wished to keep away from getting caught and killed. I arrived on the airport at 3am and was in Istanbul earlier than daybreak.
Once I arrived in Turkey, I felt impressed by the liberty that LGBTIQ+ group members get pleasure from in society. They gave me hope that I might be the girl I’m. I made new pals and began carrying good clothes, placing on make-up, and hanging out within the metropolis with them. Nonetheless, regardless of the solidarity in our group, within the wider society, I’ve confronted discrimination and hate speech right here that I’ve confronted in Lebanon.
© IOM Turkey / Begum Basaran
Leyla with a twelve-year-old son and a thirteen-year-old daughter.
‘Mom and father’
Then two good issues occurred. First, 6 months in the past, my ex-wife helped with all of the paperwork for my youngsters and my sister introduced them right here, and now they reside with me. I’m their mom and father.
Second, I contacted a middle for migrants on account of IOM, this has helped me with authorized points, reminiscent of getting my youngsters to highschool and getting common well being care. They even helped me get a job in an Arabic restaurant.
I wish to reside like myself with out worries. And once more, I’ve to thank IOM for serving to me
Life is steady, the panic is over, I’ve a child with me. Nonetheless, this isn’t the top of my journey. Turkey for me is mostly good. I wish to reside like myself with out worries. And once more, I’ve to thank IOM for getting me a foot on that path.
I went to the provincial immigration workplace for an interview, and after two days I used to be granted conditional asylum. I’ve not obtained any additional details about resettlement.
Standing by
I’m ready. I’m unsure the place I’ll find yourself. I feel it might be good to maneuver to an English or French talking nation as a result of these are the languages I converse.
I wish to finish by saying that discrimination is totally unhelpful. There is no such thing as a profit to it. It achieves nothing. It causes harm to folks in addition to harm to society.
For me, that made me stronger, and now I’ve a brand new household: the LGBTIQ+ group. Nonetheless, it’s not simply my group and my household. It’s my life, and it’s the image of my identification. And one factor I do know for certain, We’re all born equal, and all of us should be handled that method. ”
